Jodi Hills

So this is who I am – a writer that paints, a painter that writes…


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The shape of a nail. 

Traveling these last couple of months, I guess my hands have been on vacation too. No painting. No building of frames. No baking or lawn mowing. So I decided to give them some extra care. I suppose it was my friend who got it all started by greeting me with the tradition of glove gifting, accompanied by some rose hand lotion, (French of course). They smelled so good, I decided to let my nails grow. I bought the polish and varnish. Took the time to file and cream daily. I even bought the handmade cuticle oil en route in Omaha. 

I hadn’t told her about it, but of course she noticed, this glove-gifting friend. The friend who started giving me the gloves each year because that’s what my mother gave to her yearly for Christmas. She said, “You have your mother’s hands.” To be seen, to be known, from acts of kindness down to the shape of a nail — What a gift to be given!

Years ago I painted my grandmother’s hands and gave them to my mother. She passed on that love to me. To my friends, her friends. Hand by hand we can touch each other. Heart by heart, we hold each other, ever.


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Of being carried.

I was watching something on netflix. I don’t even remember the movie. But an image I’ve seen a million times, on the screen, in real life, a young child being carried. And it struck me so – I wish I could remember that – that feeling of being lifted. Of being carried. Of being relaxed. Feet dangling. At ease. Held up. I have no memory of this. I’m not sure most people do.

I went to bed after the movie. Still a bit anxious from the news of the day. He knew that. I explained thoughts in fragments. Puzzles of emotions. He has a way of brushing the tear, not from my eye, no, he lets it fall to the bottom of my chin, and then catches it. Telling me it’s ok to feel. Allowing me to feel. And he’ll be there. He is there. And I know it. I release the air that worry tries to trap in my lungs, and I breathe. And breathe again. And I sleep. Feet dangling. I do remember.