Jodi Hills

So this is who I am – a writer that paints, a painter that writes…


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Met with chatter.

I have an understanding with the Magpies. A crust of baguette from the kitchen window. Not the shiny object they are accused of coveting, but well lit for certain, under the summer sun of Provence. The exchange is met with chatter, and somehow we both know what feeds our soul.

This constant craving that keeps me returning to the studio — to paint again, for the first time — is me, magpie-ing that feeling. To find the face in the new portrait is to find a bit of myself. To dare going past that first stroke. To dare as well the letting go.  All in search of the crust that feeds me. 

The light in Provence is like no other. Perhaps I was unprepared at first, for this great reveal. (Are we ever prepared to really see things?) On the ledge outside the studio, I can view the colors I don’t even remember painting. Like a lost memory in the heart that says, “Oh, I’m ready to shine.” That is willing and able to admit that I’m not just black and white, but blue. To show it all is to risk it all. But I, like the Magpie, have come to brave the creak of the handle. The clank of the window opening. All for the taste of a slip of lavender honey on no ordinary crust of bread. 

The light is calling. My heart chatters — I will not refuse. 


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Another Magpie.

I saw the black and white feathers in the lawn. It’s funny how you can tell the difference between something let go, and something torn apart. While I don’t want anything to hurt our backyard birds, my first thought was, I hope it wasn’t another Magpie. 

It’s ironic I suppose, the closer you are to someone, the less you see it coming. 

But the resilience of the heart and brain. To keep trusting. To keep loving. It’s so beautiful. And isn’t it even more beautiful that I don’t think about it. That I have to be reminded of it, by feathers in the yard. 

I walk through the vacation of our summer yard. Nearly bare of clothes and worry. The birds flutter and sing, and I know we all have it. This youth of spirit. To forgive. To barefoot again upon love’s green, beneath the chatter, the hope of the Magpie. 


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A whistle in the doorway.

I don’t know if it’s the same Magpie, but for the last three days in a row, when I walk past our greenhouse, one has been furiously trapped inside the glass. Even though the door is wide open, (and the way he got in), he beats himself into a panic. I struggle to know what to do. I stand at the door and whistle. Foolish probably. In all that flapping, I’m not sure he hears me. But so far, he has escaped. 

And it makes me wonder, if it is the same one, why does he keep going in? Or if it’s a different one, why hasn’t he told his friends about it – warned them? And I have to laugh, because why would the Magpie be so much more advanced than we humans. I mean, I know it first hand. I have to learn the same lessons over and over. My victory being a little less flapping each time, and a little more conversation with my friends. And I believe we have that responsibility, when we find a way, an opening, to clear the entry for others. Now some might grumble, “well, I had to do it on my own….” — and sure, we all find ourselves in that position at some point — and bravo to anyone who makes it through — but maybe, just maybe, if we were all in the clear, and all that violent flapping turned into a conversation, who knows what we could accomplish?

It’s just a thought — maybe only a whistle in the doorway — but still, it’s nice here, so I keep waving, I keep calling.