My mind is fast – not necessarily smart… but it moves quickly and can pick up speed with what ifs… complete conversations (both sides) of what could happen. And then I have to tell myself to just slow down… let my mind be still.
I fell in love with the library right away. When I was in the first grade, every Thursday we got to pick out a library book. The library. The smell of old, turned, eyed pages… limitless worlds to visit and friends to make… the endless possibilities. Aaahhh, the possibilities… that’s where my love affair with the library slightly went off track. On Wednesday nights I would panic. There was never enough time given to pick out the right book. I wanted the best book. The right book. The book that would take me away. Take me to the most wondrous of places. It was so important. So many of the other 6 year olds just picked anything off the shelf… or maybe they knew… it seemed so easy for them. Wednesday night – no sleep. Then my mother would climb into my bed. She would tell me to go to a section. Touch the bindings. Be still, and you’ll know. Be still. She was right. I breathed. I touched. I chose. I was in love again.
It’s a rainy day in Aix en Provence. I hold my book (on my ipad) in my hand. I imagine the smell of Washington Elementary Library. I am still…and in love.